Ion Saliu's Book of Records —
History, Discoveries, Achievements, Truth, Challenges
By Laius Usail, Human At-Large
• Ion Saliu is the fastest human in history to write his first 1000 Web pages
• Ion Saliu is the fastest human in history to write his first 500 computer programs. A great accomplishment as such inspired Ion Saliu in writing a great computing song:
• Ion Saliu made a mathematical discovery that should have been made 300 years ago. Still, Ion Saliu is the fastest human in history to discover the discovery. Paradoxical? Well, we are talking about Ion Saliu's Paradox of N Trials.
• Ion Saliu is the fastest human in history to find the correct philosophical, logical, and mathematical solutions to the paradoxes of Sophist Zeno of Elea. Most notably, Ion Saliu offers compelling proofs that the so-called Paradox of Achilles and the tortoise is nothing but an absurdity. Let us mark down this score as an historic moment:
Achilles & Ion Saliu versus Zeno & Tortoise: 1 – 0, in overtime.
The game lasted at least two millennia, three centuries, one hundred twenty-one years, thirteen months, six weeks, nine days, 44 hours, 155 minutes, and 84 seconds.
: one night, one day, four hours, twenty-one minutes, and twenty-one seconds.
• Ion Saliu is the fastest human in history to make up all the permutations, combinations of the sounds, letters, and syllables of his name. You can too, by using Ion Saliu's genius software… guaranteed!
• Ion Saliu is the fastest human in history to prove that the immortal work of Shakespeare or any great writing cannot be duplicated for the life of the solar system.
, then back, and so forth... (everything in the infinity repeats with a degree of certainty of 37%)…
. Such concepts are absolute absurdities from the standpoint of mathematics, because absolute certainty is absolute absurdity.
• Ion Saliu is the fastest human in history to apply the normal probability rule (bell curve) to numerical sociology. Each human faces, in a lifetime, a split-nation of vicious haters and embarrassing adulators.
Of all individuals a human subject interacts with, 99.7% fall within three standard deviations of agreement-disagreement with said human. One half of the 0.3% of the two extremities is represented by vicious haters; the other half is represented by libidinous adulators. One thousand individuals of interaction provide a small team of three haters/adulators. One million individuals of interaction lead to a small town of 3000. One billion individuals of interaction build a small nation of 3,000,000 — half of them vicious haters, the other half unbearable adulators.
Einstein, you were so wrong about “God doesn't play dice with the Universe”! The Universe is a random game. In fact, it is so dicey, that a gamma-ray burst or a supernova can wipe us out or suck us in without scientific notice. You attempted beyond the impossible: The absurd. The Truth was Godly Order for you. Same as for old Newton: the Truth was not in the stars but in the zodiac (“The World will end in the Grace year of 2060.”).
Old-old Archimedes knew it better. There is no absolute certainty. There are no constants in the whole Cosmos. Archimedes righteously said: “Give me a fixed point in Cosmos, and I shall move the Earth.” That was also a reference to his law of leverage.
• Ion Saliu is the fastest human on Earth to discover the fundamental concepts of Degree of Certainty and Randomness as the attribute of the Universe. See a major example of the influence of his theories on Randomness, Degree of Certainty, Order, God, :
- The Drunkard's Walk: How Randomness Rules Our Lives.
• Ion Saliu is the fastest human in history to prove that resentment-envy-jealousy-hatred is one side of the equation that caused huge destruction in human history BUT also triggered creative advancement. How life-saving-important is on what side of the coin Fate tosses one! And Time is of the essence (Time as in Era)! What doesn't kill me, makes me stronger”, maddog Nietzsche said. Blitser, Blitser, Crocodile ...
• You see that fast man in town or hiking in the wilderness? That's Ion Saliu. He is also known by the unique, one-word, royalty name of Parpaluck. Here is Parpaluck's photo… Be mindful that Ion Saliu is not happy-go-lucky — he is a very serious Homo sapiens; or, more precisely, Homo Computing_Beast.
But don't you ever dare double-cross righteously fierce Ion Saliu! Regardless of your religion, no gods could defend you… Parpaluck knocked out all them gods!
Read Ion Saliu's first book in print: Probability Theory, Live!
~ Discover profound philosophical implications of the Formula of TheEverything, including philosophy, gambling, lottery, software, computer programming.
Doctor en Ciencia Oculta de la Vision,
Doctor in Occult Science of Vision
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